Is it possible to erase a person from existence?
by Alatariel07
Summary: Its been four months since Harry died. I've tryed to convince myself that HE doesn't exist to me anymore. Maybe I should just forget and move on. Hermione gently wiped away a tear that was now rolling down her face...
1. Unexpected Pains

Hey this is my second fan fiction and I don't know how you all will like it. It's kind of short but if you like it so much I might continue. This is just what thinking about my life gets me. I hope you enjoy and don't forget to review. Thanks oh yea and I don't own Harry Potter, the only thing I think I own is the plot or at least I hope I own it. At the beginning it is a narrator speaking but then it goes into the POV of Hermione.  
  
Is it Possible to Erase a Person from Existence?  
  
It has been four months since Harry died. It seems Ron and Hermione are taking it well, but you never know what goes on in others heads. Now Ron and Hermione don't spend as much of their time together. Ron has found a new group of friends to hang with and Hermione has been spending a lot of her time by herself, in a little room writing in a diary. But as one might expect her to be writing about Harry's death, it seems that far from her mind...  
  
I have been trying to convince myself that HE doesn't exist to me anymore. But the more I try the more I seem to think about him, and the angrier I seem to get. I have been so much happier since I have broken our friendship, it seems like. I have been sleeping later, laughing more, and not thinking so much of my pain but of others. It seems as in loosing a 'good' friend; I have found the true me again. The me that has been long forgotten. But as I try to forget everything, I can't help but wonder what it would be like, if we were still friends. We haven't talked in so long and something inside me tells me it's not right. But when I see myself happy, I just push that feeling aside as if it was nothing. Everything he had done to me, every night he made e cry still makes me wish he would burn in hell and get wheat he deserves. I try to think, I try to forget but the memories are all around me, the pain still consumes me. Still the 'what if' crosses my mind as if I didn't already have enough to deal with. It makes me wonder if I can mend the broken friendship; it makes me wonder if I should. All the broken promises, the lies, the hallow apologies. It seems my heart can't take anymore of it. I try and convince myself it's for the better. I try to believe that he too, is happier. I try to...to hide from the truth. I'm just afraid. Afraid of being happy with him as a friend. It's been so long since I've talked to him; it would seem awkward now to do so. Maybe I should just forget and move on. Maybe...it's for the better. Dwelling in the past is never a good thing, for the past can't be undone, nor can it change. So is this a new chapter of my life? I do hope so.  
  
Hermione finished the last sentence. She was sitting at a desk in front of a window. As she slowly closed the little leather bound book she looked out the window. She saw Ron walking down a hill with his 'new' group of friends. Hermione gently wiped away a tear that was now rolling down her face. She watched her best friend, her only friend left, walk away forever. Him never really knowing how much she cared for him and he will never truly know. She could never express herself to his face. She could only write in words her true feelings in the little book that held her deepest thoughts. Was this truly the beginning of her 'new' life? Was she ready for the change?  
  
Ok...please tell me what you think because I might continue. This was kind of a sad idea but this is based on my life right now. These are pretty much my words and feelings to loosing a great friend and I really don't know why. But anyway enough with my sad and pathetic life...I hope you enjoyed yourself and please review I love feedback on my stories...any kind I don't really care... more might come soon it all depends on how well you like. 


	2. My Darkness

Chapter 2: My Darkness

Ron knocked on the door to Hermione's room but no one answered.

"Hermione? Are you there? Please answer." Ron pleaded at the other end of the door. He knew she was there; she never went anywhere after the incident happened. He knew deep down she was in pain. But there was nothing he could do. He didn't know how to talk to her anymore. All she did was cry when he was around. So he left, he stopped talking to her altogether. He didn't like seeing her in so much pain. He thought she would get better if he wasn't around. Ron pushed open the door and walked in.

"Hermione? Are you ok?" Ron said looking very worried. She had her back towards the door sitting at the desk that faced the window. Ron walked up to her and put his hand on her shoulder. She didn't even acknowledge his presence she just sat there staring out the window.

"Oh my gosh?!" Ron exclaimed, the worry not leaving his voice for a second. He knelt down in front of her chair. She looked absolutely horrible. It seemed that she hadn't eaten in days.

"Hermione you have to pull yourself together. He's gone and he's never coming back" As Ron said this, tears started to fall from his face. He pulled Hermione into a deep, meaningful hug. He had seen his best friend murdered and now was seeing his other best friend fall to pieces. The images of Harry's death haunted his dreams at night. He tried to run away and forget it all but it never worked. The images of Harry's death flashed before his eyes.

'Flashback'

It was at the same graveyard Harry visited when he witnessed the murdered of Cedric. It was Ron, Harry, and Hermione waiting in the darkness.

"Harry can we please go? How do we even know he will be here?" Hermione pleaded.

"No! He will pay for taking Sirius from me." Harry exclaimed.

"But how do you even know he will come?" Ron said siding with Hermione.

"He will be here. He wants me so now he will get me." Harry said now shaking with pure anger.

"Harry!! Please be careful I think I can hear him." Hermione said shaking from the cold. Both Hermione and Ron turned around to where they heard the noise. One second later they turned back and the most horrible thing they had ever seen happened.

"HARRY!!!" Ron and Hermione screamed but it was too late. Voldamort snuck up behind his and caught him off guard. Harry was falling in defeat.

"NO!!" Hermione cried, falling to the ground.

"Let's get out of here now!" Ron yelled pulling Hermione to her feet. Ron dragged her back to the port-key at which they got there. They could hear the cry of victory from behind them. When they were on the other side of the port-key, they just sat there too stunned to move. Hermione still crying, wanting to go back for him. Ron had to hold her back as she broke down in his arms. She sat there forever it seemed like crying in his arms. Dumbledore found them like that on the floor in front of the port-key. Dumbledore immediately knew what happened, got them to the hospital wing of the castle, and didn't ask any questions.

'End of flashback'

As Ron sat there he had no idea what was going on inside Hermione's mind, all he could do was hope that she would come around. Hermione just sat there as Ron embraced her, very many thoughts going through her mind. None of which she could ever speak. She just sat there with a blank look on her face.

'I'm lonely, there's nothing I can do about it. My world is turning into a disaster. I am lost in the dark without a light. I thought I knew everything, but I don't, I don't even know myself anymore. All I want is for someone to understand my pain, understand me. But I'm asking for too much. I keep falling deeper and deeper in the whole that I can't find my way out of. I feel like giving up, but I can't even do that, I made a promise that I must keep. I wish someone would find me and help me out. I'm here all by myself, forever. My face is stained with my tears. I want to give up and take away the pain of him, I want to forget. Forget everything he has caused. The times I think I have forgotten, he comes back as vivid as ever. Still with the same smile, still reaching for my hand. But when I reach for it, it's gone. Then his smile slowly fades away in the distance. That same smile haunts me. I will never know the warmth of it ever again. The vision of him is forever burned into the back of my mind. Never again will I see it, never again will I embrace it, never again will I know it. All I have left are my memories. The faint memories of happier days. Will I ever meet another man like him? Will there ever be a light to lead me home? Now I can only dream. But all dreams must come to an end. This is all I have left to look forward to, deep, dark, loneliness. Never again will a light suppress the darkness that rest deep inside my heart. The darkness consumes my body. The darkness that is in my soul, in me, I now realize it IS me.'

This is all Hermione ever thinks about anymore.

Ron sat there for about an hour or so until he finally let the embrace go.

"Hermione, you can't do this to yourself. I know it's painful. I was there too. It haunts me too. We can get through this together. You have to believe. I'm sorry I haven't been there for you. I didn't know how to handle it so I just tried to think it never happened. I didn't want anything to do with any of it. Now I see that you need me. So I'm not going to run away. Not anymore. I need you to come back to me." Ron pleaded to Hermione as she sat there with the same look on her face as the day he died.

"Hermione, PLEASE! I'll be right back with help." Ron got up from the floor, kissed her on the forehead and then ran out of the room towards the hospital wing.

A/N: hello I know how I said there was most likely not going to be anymore to the story but there is. I am in one of my mood again, at which point I like my writing so here it is. I hope you enjoy it. Please review and tell me what you think. Just no asking where I came up with this, you don't want to know. Well bye for now I don't know if there will be anymore, just depends on my moodï


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